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in the last two days- my car stereo quit working (it has no damn power). my glasses snapped in half. our home ac has stopped blowing (it makes a sound like it is blowing, but the cold air isn't really coming out of the vents). our internet also keeps going up and down and up and down over and over again (i swear, if i didn't already have a cable modem i would be finding something else...). two of our three toilets are broken. i. can't. deal. things need to fucking stop. they need to fucking stop. that is simply the way i feel about it. i am still trying to get myself back together after far too many major life events this last year- i don't need these fucking hassles every hour. breathe in. breathe out. now i am going to relax in the sweltering heat of our home. tomorrow, i will drive to work with headphones on (because believe it or not- i am a better driver with music- it makes my desire to KILL every other driver on the road so much less...without that pleasant distraction i am a bitch behind the wheel. i know this, and i know this is something i need to work on...but as i have said before- i have enough i am working on right now. i don't need any further self-improvement hobbies right now. as it is- i will be trying to make the few changes i am working on now for the next 60 years or so... and i do have my road rage under much better control *when* i have my music to listen to...i need a pleasant distraction... sigh. i think i am having a pity party in my head. but it just gets me because it really doesn't seem to make a damn difference if i try to do a good job, or the right thing- or not. i can be a royal fuck up and my life is a fucked up mess. i can try my ass off to make things better, and my life is a fucked up mess. damned if you do, damned if you don't. i know i can call the landlords tomorrow, but i don't want them in our house. my house is my haven- it is where all the other people in the world are not. i don't want to invite these people into my world. not right now. anywho, with any luck i will feel a little better tomorrow. if i had any sense at all, i would crawl into bed and just stay hidden until tomorrow...
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